My Poppop

I just got off the phone with my mother... my grandfather passed away about an hour ago. Yesterday he'd had a heart attack and was put on a ventilator to keep him breathing... but his wishes were to not be kept alive by machines. If he couldn't do it on his own, he wouldn't do it at all. He was always a stubborn man. It was probably his most defining quality. It is likely the reason my mother is so stubborn, and thus the reason that I am too. But he loved us all very much, and through his grumpy old man facade he always wore, you could never miss the caring, mischievous twinkle in his eyes. The twinkle that was there when at Christmas a few years back he gave me a box of clementines. I couldn't stop laughing. I believe at Thanksgiving I'd made a silly joke that clementines were fancy, expensive food that I couldn't afford... I don't believe I've ever seen one since and not thought of him. I don't know that I ever will.

Even though I rarely had the opportunity to see my grandfather, the world already seems a little emptier without him in it. It just seems that he belongs as a part of it somewhere, snipping at someone he loves and smiling happily to himself because he knows that they love him just as much. I prayed earlier today that if he had to go, an angel would come to take him home. I hope that angel was prepared, because I doubt that my Poppop is any less feisty on the other side.


I love you Poppop, and will miss you. If you find Zipper up there, give him the biggest hug from me.