I Wish Life Were Like The Sims

The Sims have it so good.

They get promotions on the first day of work, and if they want another one, all they have to do is paint a picture or play chess for a while.

Every time they apply for a job in the paper, they get hired.

People come over to visit at all times of day, and sometimes they bring presents.

Even the average middle class citizen can afford a maid.

Sometimes when they answer the phone, people give them money instead of asking for it.

Food in the fridge never goes bad, and they only pay for what they take out of it.

Every dresser comes with a complete wardrobe in their size, but there is no laundry to do.

They don't pay for gas. There is always a carpool or bus, and it is always on time.

They never get older.

With enough effort, they can make anyone fall in love with them.

No one makes fun of them when they dance.

When they throw a party, everyone shows up.

It is perfectly acceptable to eat off of the floor.

Every one of them can juggle.