Gardening Grows the Spirit...

It really does. I should get one of those rocks that says that for my garden. I have put a lot of time and money into my garden lately, because I found out something the other day. I was feeling absolutely miserable, and wanted to go crawl under my bed and live there, but I had bought some seeds so I figured I should plant them. So I sulked into some old clothes, sulked out onto my patio, and sulkily started digging in the dirt. I don't know how much time had passed, but there was a point where I stopped, did a mental inventory on my emotions, and realized that it is dark and scary under my bed, and there are probably spiders. I was actually enjoying myself. In the midst of everything that was going on with my life, I was having fun. Thus began my new hobby.

I don't really know anything about gardening, but I am learning by trial and error. This year I learned that there is a difference between POTTING soil and GARDEN soil. Now there's a crappy mistake. I have to cover up my garden with trash bags when it rains for now, or I will lose everything. But, you live, you learn, you garden, you learn some more. So I bought a CD boom box and some more pots and flowers and all that jazz. I even bought one of those silly things you stick in the ground that is tall and metal and has a fake flower on top; this is nice, because as of yet I have no actual flowers.

As much as this new turn of events has drawn on my bank account, I have realized that it is worth it. Instead of waking up in the morning and feeling like there is no point in getting up, I jump out of bed and hit the patio, carefully examining the soil for any signs of life. I think my neighbors know I'm crazy now... every morning and evening, and several times throughout the day, I am out there watering, and crouching down looking at piles of dirt like someone who just accidentally burried their contact lense.

Today my efforts paid off. Three of the kinds of flowers I planted have started to poke up into the sunlight and stretch their little green arms out in delight. Maybe it is silly that I get so much joy from this. I mean, I didn't really DO anything. I just dropped some seeds into some dirt. Mother Nature has been growing seeds on her own since the beginning of time. But yet, I get some internal sense of pride, excitement, and joy out of seeing those little green sprouts. I feel like I have accomplished something. I feel like I have brought life into the world. I feel... good.

My garden doesn't exactly look like the cover of Apartment and Garden magazine, but it is mine. No one told me how to plant it, and I put my heart into it. I look forward to getting off of work at the end of the day now. Instead of wondering what I am going to do with myself until it is time for bed, I am thinking about how many new little green leaves of happiness I will see when I get home. If you don't have a garden, or the space for one, plant a seed in a pot and love it. You would be unbelievingly surprised at how much it heals a wounded soul.